Sunday, May 16, 2010

Brooke Fraser

For those of you unfamiliar with this woman.

I highly recommend her.

She is a prolific songwriter who understands the craft of story and writing much greater than I do.

The following is some of what I've read recently on her blog. To see more of what she is doing and what she has done please type your way to the following

all love friends. Enjoy.


In this blog I’ll discuss the foundation on which your songs are built. Whether you like it or not, there is one, and it’s you. Your worldview, your motives, your ‘issues’ are indelibly marked on everything you create in your life – whether it’s a song or a conversation or a Tweet. Being aware of your headspace and internal-environment goes a long way to understanding why you are or aren’t writing the type of songs you’d like to.

Over the past few years, many of you have written to me and said you would appreciate it if at some point I could share a little about songwriting. It isn’t something I’ve written about before, and as much as I enjoy blogging about everything non-music related, for some reason now feels like the right time to bring this wee series to the table. This certainly isn’t an objective study on the theme – what I write here will be subjective, personal, completely taken from my own journey as a writer. I’m in no way attempting to table a thesis here or pretend I’m some sort of expert, which I absolutely am not. So with that cleared up, on we go.

You Are What You Eat

In songwriting workshops I’ve been involved in in the past, I have often said (partly to get a laugh but partly because I believe in the metaphor) that songs are like poo. Songs are like poo because:

1) You get out what you put in. Many people are naturally gifted-songwriters, but many successful songwriters are people who aren’t naturally musically gifted but have worked really hard at their craft. Read Malcolm Gladwell’s “Outliers”… it brilliantly dissects the “myths” behind success – culture and opportunity have a lot to do with it… but the truth is, people who excel at anything usually work really, really hard. The 10,000 hour rule.

2) It is a product of what you feed yourself. If you feed yourself rubbish, what you output will be rubbish. I you feed yourself nutritiously, what comes out will be healthy. It’s the same with what we feed ourselves emotionally and spiritually. (I’m not going to get all weird on you, don’t worry – this is pretty logical.) If you’re listening to music with lots of minor chords and cynical lyrics about how the world is an awful, desolate hell and where no one can be trusted, reading depressing books, watching depressing films… it isn’t unlikely that your worldview* will reflect the negativity and cynicism you’re dwelling on/putting into yourself through your eyes and ears.

*“1. the overall perspective from which one sees and interprets the world. 2. A collection of beliefs about life and the universe held by an individual or group”

I’ll expand on this a little now. If you’re an artist or creative person of some kind, your artistic “digestive system” is your heart, mind and senses, your soul. So if something affects your soul, it affects your art.


Last year we introduced my music to the Americans for the first time. We toured extensively, did press/promo and achieved some exciting results. We substantially increased our touring base in the U.S. and by the end of 2008 were playing to audiences up to eight times the size of those I played to when we first did some showcases at the end of 2007. Thanks to U.S. iTunes selecting Albertine as Editor’s Choice for a week in June and putting a banner on their homepage, the Albertine record reached #5. You amazing people that came to shows sponsored swathes of precious children through World Vision and raised a ton of money for development work in Rwanda through the light-bulb t-shirt we introduced on the September tour. This was huge for us.

But behind the scenes a whole bunch of other stuff was going on and by the end of the year I was emotionally exhausted and the long period of sustained high stress had wrecked my body. I was forced to pull out of my last scheduled tour of the year and spent the month of October in bed on aggressive antibiotics. In November I took off to Africa, a place that is always challenging and healing for me. I didn’t want a bar of being Brooke Fraser. It took me a while to be able to pick up a guitar again.

Now it’s July 2009. I’ve picked up my guitar again, opened up Garageband and poised my pencil and I’m ready to be a conduit of the songs I’m trusting will come. But I’m more aware than ever of how my internal environment will affect the songs that come out of me. So to be honest, the way I’ve been writing so far is by dealing with all the “stuff” on the inside that I do not want to colour what I write and more importantly, how I live and hope and trust. Before I pick up the guitar or sit at the keyboard, I’ve been “writing” by feeding on the stuff I do want to mark my life and my art… hope, grace, forgiveness. Don’t get me wrong – I will write this next record very honestly and it won’t be all rainbows and butterflies – but I’m aware of the ‘aroma’ I want my songs to have, and it’s not one of bitterness, but one of grace. Grace doesn’t deny a wrong suffered or pretend it wasn’t that big a deal, but forgives it and loves in spite of it. I’ve received it so now I’ve gotta learn to give it, even though I’m not always the best at this and I’m still angry about some things. I am human.

Humanity and Art

“[Picasso] said this one thing I really did like, he said “good taste is the enemy of great art” which I think is very true. Good taste has all to do with being cultured and being refined and if art has to do with anything, it has to do with being human.” – Rich Mullins

Therein lies the guts of what I’ve attempted to unpack a little today. The humanity behind our art. Our struggle to navigate the world and society with all the infinite uniqueness of our personality, family background, emotional and genetic heritage, temperament, talents, mistakes, triumphs, preferences, IQ, sexuality, spirituality, language, birth order, addictions, allergies et cetera. Finding our place in the beautiful brokenness that is humanity and observing and recording what we discover along the way. I think the greatest art will always come from honest descriptions/depictions of our experience in the great in-between of being human.
Here’s to your humanity and mine, and the art it shall make

This blog will be about the actual writing process, with all its peaks and valleys, frustration and elation. I’ll cover inspiration, beginning a song and crafting a song .

I originally had elements such as melody and lyric as part of the ‘craft’ section of this blog, but in getting to it discovered there was so much I wanted to cover that I realised they were asking for their own blog (I plan to post that one within a day of this, so you won’t have to wait another six weeks!).

The creative process differs hugely from person to person, and even varies from work to work, piece to piece. I am not theorising about everyone else’s process, I’m simply trying to unpack my own for the amusement of any who may be interested. Happy reading (hope you’re in a comfy chair!)…

1. INSPIRATION– “Spark / Seeing”
Bloody inspiration. I think it’s every lazy journalist’s default fallback question. “Where does your inspiration come from?”. Stepping back a bit though, I think the question used to irritate me so much because I really didn’t understand what they were asking, let alone how to answer it. For most of my songwriting life, I’d always just “feel” when a song was churning around in my belly and I’d go to an instrument and it would come. Or I’d be at an instrument mucking around, then a song would turtlehead and I would get to work chipping and carving and coercing and bribing it out. But which aspect of that was “inspiration” and how it had come to me – I find that impossible to pin down and I certainly don’t think it’s necessarily anything I did in that moment to have it come. If we speak of inspiration as the spark that lights the fire, I suppose much of what we do as songwriters or artists is like banging stones together – preparing, being aware of our internal ‘climate’ (see previous blog), reading, writing, scribbling, sitting at an instrument and playing and fiddling and noodling – and hoping furiously that if we bang our stones together for long enough, a spark will eventually come.

I’ve always identified with the Michelangelo quote: “I saw the angel in the marble and I carved until I set him free.”

As it relates to songwriting, the “seeing” is the inspiration (the churning in the belly, the spark, the thing that fires you up so much that you cannot keep it in) and the “carving” is the craft, the tools with which we set our “song” free.

Finishing a song can sometimes feel like an insurmountable task, but beginning can often be just as daunting, sitting around waiting for a spark. Here are some ideas that might help you get off the blocks:

Beginning with Harmony (Chords)
The most common way for a song to begin for me is actually by finding some kind of harmonic bed (chord progression) which feels good to me… I will play around with capo positions if I’m on the guitar (for some reason I have a penchant for frets 3 and 5), different voicings, emphases and sometimes tuning (but I’m no guitar maestro so much of the time I don’t really know what I’m doing, which can often be helpful believe it or not). Often a melody will come to me when I find a chord grouping that resonates with me. “The Thief”, “Hymn”, “C.S. Lewis Song” are examples of this. I find the chords often can indicate to you where the melody should/could go, too… but I’ll expand on this in the next blog specifically dealing with elements of song.

Beginning with Melody
Sometimes a melody will come to you and lead off an idea. Some little line pops into your head in the car or in the grocery store or the shower, and with a little encouragement and context (chords) you can find a flow and follow it. Deciphering Me and Love is Waiting were like this. Lots of writers I know have that little mic attachment for iPod that they record ideas with. I’m not so advanced – my recording tools are my phone and Garageband (comes pre-installed on Macs). When a melody line pops into your head – RECORD it a.s.a.p.! I cannot tell you the number of times I’ve had great melodies come to me at an inconvenient time and I’ve thought to myself “I’ll remember that later”. And I don’t. Also with garageband, make sure you press ‘save’, not ‘don’t save’ when you exit the programme. Last week I got a chorus melody to a song I’ve been working on for ages, just as I was running out the door to a meeting. I quickly put it down in Garageband, quit Garageband, shut down my laptop and ran out the door. I came back to the file later and the chorus WASN’T THERE. Devastation.

Beginning with Lyric
Carry a notebook with you. Sometimes I’ll use the ‘memo’ function on my phone to jot down a lyric idea, but I find that a bit soul-less. I’m a pen to paper, lo-fi, kinda gal. I would be mortified if anyone ever saw the contents of the various notebooks I’ve carried with me over the years. They are filled with all kinds of notions, thoughts, phrases, quotes and crazy stream-of-consciousness weird stuff… but some of that stuff will spark a song later on, so I write it all anyway.

Beginning with Rhythm
One of the reasons I started playing the guitar at 15 (late starter) was because I was sick of writing slow piano songs (piano is my first instrument). It’s a rare night you’ll see me play without a guitar in front of me… part of it is a muscle memory thing, part of it is just that I love rhythm – it’s how I feel part of a song. Because melody lines/sung parts often flow over staccato rhythms (and I’d get quite bored with just participating in a song like that I think) I love being able to smash my guitar and be right there in the action of the song. Rhythm has been the founding factor of songs like “Hosea’s Wife”, “Lifeline” (off WTDWD) and “Albertine”. Have a play around with different rhythms and strum patterns and see if it helps a new idea emerge. Listen to music with rhythms that are different to those you might normally start with when you’re in autopilot.

Beginning with Story
I can’t say I do this a lot, but I have friends who write the majority of their songs by using a story (true or imagined) as a frame and then musically/lyrically filling it in, using narrative or first-person. My friend Ben says that he does this because then he doesn’t have to come up with a lot of clever one liners, he can just lyrically illustrate a character (really he is a genius and he’s just being modest). A lot of artists I admire use this method and it’s not something I am naturally very good at so I will probably experiment with it some more in the future. It’s good to work on your weaknesses. If you just work from your strengths all the time, you might start to think you’re awesome, which none of us are, and your songs will sound ‘samey’ and eventually you may hit a dead end. Plus you’ll be arrogant, which is never attractive. I think part of being a good anything, whether it be a writer, a musician or a good mum, is to develop and sow into the areas we struggle with.
(NB: People who are good at this: Joni Mitchell (my hero), Bob Dylan, Brighteyes, about a million other people who aren’t me)

3. CRAFT – “Carving”
Once you’ve begun… what do you do? Here’s where the chasing, sitting and distinctly unglamorous hard work kick in.

For me personally, once I’ve begun, I set about the task of getting to know the song. It probably sounds quite odd, but nowadays I see my songs as people. Once I meet them via ‘beginning’, I must set about asking questions – trying to “see” the song in order to “carve” it out (that Michelangelo quote again).
Does the song feel like a lullaby, a dirge, an anthem, a waltz, a power-punch, a ballad? It may be sweet at the beginning, but does it have a dark twist at the end? Or does it want to stay sweet all the way? I try not to impose my preferences on the song – I don’t want to make it someone it isn’t. This part is pretty much all instinct. Listen to your gut.

Part of the reason I am averse to co-writing is because often you find yourselves in situations where you are pressured to “finish an idea” or “find the killer hook” in a day or even a few hours. This may be good for commerce but I think it does art a disservice. Songwriting for me is only satisfying when it is personal, intimate and costly. There is the mystery and then there is the labour. They go hand in hand. We’ve dealt a little with the mystery/inspiration, now here’s some thoughts on the labour aspect of things:

3.1 Getting Stuck
Frustration is virtually inevitable, but so is elation once you’ve found the path around your obstacle.
Here are a few things I do when I get stuck:

Move to another instrument
I find a change of how I see the chords, i.e. moving from guitar to piano or vice versa can help me get past an impasse. If you only play one instrument, or don’t play at all, take your idea to someone who does play another instrument and see if that helps. However, I recommend to anyone who wants to write to take the time to learn some basic chords on a piano or guitar and use them! I have a friend who can’t play to save herself, but went and learned some basic chords and plays around with different voicings and variations of them. She has gone on to become an incredible writer, and I’m so grateful that she took the time to equip herself, because I as a listener am benefitting from the fruits!

Do something else for a while
Whilst writing with my friend William Fitzsimmons recently, I twittered this: “Warning: If you ever ‘co-write’ with me, it will involve long bouts of doing nothing, lots of cups of tea and pauses to enjoy youtube. It may seem at first like we are doing nothing… but we are simply tricking the song into thinking we are not paying attention so that it will quit its shyness and come the heck out.” Maybe that’s a little bit of insight into how I work, but I find getting stressed and throttling a song by the neck has never helped me. As with passing a bowel movement (refer to first blog ‘Climate’), you just have to relax, read a magazine, pick at your cuticles, ‘ped-egg’ the dry skin on your feet, whatevs. Go fishing or something, then come back and have another crack.

Work on a different idea
I am always working on a bunch of ideas at once. If I get stuck on one, I’ll move to the next, and the next, then come back to it, then onto the next, etc.

3.2 Perseverance
Oh how underrated is this virtue in our generation! iPods, iPhones, myspace etc… it’s all about me and what I want right this minute. But nothing of value comes for free. What’s true in life is true in art… PERSEVERE.

I started writing songs at 12 years of age. I can say with confidence that all the songs I wrote between then and ‘Better’ when I was 17 were utter crap. And there were hundreds of them. If you want to feel better about yourself, go look up some of my early B-sides. Absolute shockers. BUT those absolute shockers were the stepping stones to the better, acceptable-for-public-listening songs I would go on to write. Even now I’m still utterly embarrassed by a bunch of songs from my first record, but you know what? I’m grateful for them. Every song you write helps you become a better writer and find your own voice as an artist. The evidence of my journey so far is now immortalised on CD and hard drive, and as much as my pride would like to destroy the embarrassing stuff, hopefully it’s a testimony to perseverance and time.

3.3 Hard Work
I wrote “Albertine” in a morning after my return from my first trip to Rwanda in 2005 (it’s arguable that I’d already done the groundwork for the song with my eight straight hours of journalling on the flights home). Yet “Love, Where Is Your Fire?” was written in various hotel rooms in Tokyo, L.A., London & Australasia and took me more than two years to complete. “Love is Waiting” took about the same and was completed about 30 seconds before I had to go in and sing the final vocal on the record (and we left it until last). I am still not totally happy with the lyrics even today and wish I could have given it more time. It’s not my best.

Leonard Cohen’s famous 1984 song “Hallelujah” has been covered by over 200 artists – the Jeff Buckley version being perhaps the most widely known (Rufus Wainwright’s is impeccable too). It is still being covered in studios, bars and cafes the world over today. It sounds effortless, but the story goes that Cohen penned a massive EIGHTY (yes, 80) verses before he came to the verses that became the song.

Charles Wesley, the famous hymnist, wrote 6000 hymns. Six freakin’ thousand.

No shortcuts. Give your songs the chance to be excellent. Shove that in your cultural ADD and smoke it. (No offence to people with actual ADD intended.)

Write and write and write and write! Spend the time, listen to lots of music, read about how other people create, talk to other people about how create, work hard, have fun, enjoy the journey!


I've been learning a lot about the present lately. Being present. It is a task that has proven to be quite difficult.

Im currently thinking about a million things that need to get done for whatever reason that life merits. Laundry, Cleaning,
Errands, Apts, Work, Coffee dates, Emails, etc.

However there is a subdued longing in me that really wants to be here. in this little coffee shop, with my thoughts, the cloudy day outside and the contrast of the bright green on the trees against a subdued sky.

So here I will sit.

Hope you are having a wonderful Sunday afternoon friends.

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Check Out My Friends!

I've been meaning to do this for awhile, but some friends of mine are making some pretty awesome art... please go check out their stuff, especially if you are in Nashville, they are extremely talented and its a privilege to know them and to share their art with other people.

Alva Leigh

I met Allie in our freshman dorm (Hail Hall) 5 years ago at Belmont. I noticed a pair of converse shoes she was wearing and she noticed mine and we decided to trade shoes without exchanging names. She made a record a couple years ago under the name Allie Peden titled "With This Love" and is preparing the release of her new record in 2010. She's an exceptional songwriter and her songs have a voice to them that is all her own. Her music is a mix between Nashville indie love and Mississippi truth with pop thrown in along the way. You will love it.

Jake Ousley

This boy can write. Hes got a couple songs up on myspace but a whole lot more he hasn't even unveiled yet. A couple months ago he invited me to go to a YoungLife leaders retreat weekend and one of the nights we were there he played a show of just his music. The atmosphere he created was like being in a living room .... He's got a lot of stuff going on so check him out.

Kaiti Jones

I've known Kaiti for a couple years and everytime I hear her stuff I'm continually blown away. She is one of those artists that you wish played more shows because her live performance matches the quality of her recording. She recorded an Ep with Mike Odmark( Nashville producer and engineer) called Arise Child. You can buy it on itunes or get it from

Lindsey Jones
Lindsey is a singer/songwriter who is always doing great projects. I met her last year and heard her self titled Ep (produced by Andy Osenga of the Normals and Caedmons Call) She is part of a duo called This & That. They have just made their grand entrance into the Nashville scene with a killer Ep. She will be doing big things, keep an eye on her. jjones

Frothy Christmas?

I have to say.... I've lived in Nashville 5 years now and I haven't always been a fan of Frothy Monkey mainly because whenever I showed up they were closed or I thought their coffee wasn't that great. However, today I with a full stomach and a warm drink in my hand completely satisfied with my decision. Good job Frothy, I may come back and visit. No worries Portland Brew... you're still my main squeeze.

Get ready because I'm about to post some Christmas Playlist suggestions as well as an actual post....totally depending on my battery life and my attention span.

Open your itunes library or your friends and search for the following....

1. Sara B and Ingrid Michaelson - Winter Song
2. Leigh Nash - Last Christmas
3. Fiona Apple - Frosty the Christmas
4. Mindy Smith - Follow the Sheperd Home
5. Mindy Smith - I Know The Reason
6. The Choir At Your Door/ Nathan Phillips - Through the Snow
7. Sufjan Stevens - That Was The Worst Christmas Ever!
8. Rosie Thomas - River
9. Jars of Clay - Winter Skin
10. Katie Herzig - Silent Night
11. The Choir At Your Door- Its Christmas Eve I've Lost My Job

This isn't your average Christmas Playlist I mean I didn't even put Amy Grant Tennessee Christmas because we all know you are already listening to it.

Merry Christmas!

Friday, November 6, 2009

Peter Bradley Adams

Couple tings(like things but better) people....

1. I don't write to much on here anymore
2. I wish I did
3. I've decided to do a couple of music recommendation posts for the next couple of weeks. Starting tonight....

Drumrolllllllllllllll please.....

I found this record last night and I'm giving it a shout out.

Peter Bradley Adams

He is a genius with lyrics and his instrumentation is absolutely brilliant, its a mix between nickelcreek mandolin glory and traveling to the mountains in winter, or a good cry maybe.

Hear it, Love it, and share the love.... like butta.
However, he is probably a starving artist, so pay for the butta.


Tuesday, March 10, 2009


I write to all 4 or 5 of you from Portland, OR. I am currently enjoying my last spring break and I can't tell you how great it has been to sit and enjoy not doing much of anything except to drink coffee, take pictures, read, watch movies, and have good conversations with old and new friends.

Portland is a strange city. I flew in over a sea of lights that strangely had the ability to comfort me through my bumpy flight. Its odd to be introduced to a city and further more want to stay in that city when it changes its weather pattern more than I change my mind about what profession I want to pursue. But somehow Portland has the ability to make me love it despite the weather.

For some reason I've always wanted to see Reed College (which is in Portland). I had this idea about what it like was ever since I read Donald Millers Blue Like Jazz book. Today my friend Erin and i drove over to see the campus and it was so small. maybe a couple of city blocks long and there wasn't anything that really stood out about it. I kept imagining the huge festival that happens there every year, the one that everyone hears about... if you haven't heard about it, Reed has this weekend festival where all of the students get high, or try out different drugs. They even bring in a special emergency response team called the white dot that helps treat people that are having bad "drug trips." Anyway, I had a hard time picturing everything that Don talks about. It seemed so quiet and intellectual that a lot of the things he describes in his books... I couldn't quiet picture it for myself.

Yesterday, we went downtown and I was able to get some pretty good pictures, I will post those later this week if i remember. I also saw some pretty cool shops that were so original and made the city feel unique. Tomorrow, Erin and our friend Matt are heading to the coast. I think its going to be really fun, both of them have heard of some great places to check out while we are out there.

I hope everyone is doing well and check back in the next couple of days because I should have some other posts up for you guys to read about somethings I have been working on for a little while. Love as always to all of you.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Last semester of college.

My last semester of college starts tomorrow. I can't say that I a thrilled to begin this semester because I'm not sure what it actually marks for myself. I will be completing time I've spent working on a degree but other than that tangible measurement I am unsure of what life will look like come May. Its kind of odd to think that life will not be measured by the times that I have classes or free time determined by the number of hours I have left to turn in a paper.

It seems that there are always people you meet before undergoing a transition that seem to depart a word of advice about the change you are about to experience, whether you want to have it or not. When I was about to start Middle School, I was warned that other girls my age were sometimes mean and unkind towards one another. When I started high school I was told that I would encounter many opportunities to "party" as well as when i graduated I was told I would never have it as easy as I had it during my high school days. Entering college I was told that I should take the time to find the right campus for me and that it was fine if I changed my major because everyone changes it at least once. Now as I prepare to leave college, everyone has told me I will miss it and will never have a time like it again. Its almost like signs on the highway that tell you how many miles away you are from something. Or the signs that say " Now entering (insert city of choice here)"

While I am writing this I am watching planet earth, the one produced by BBC. Its wonderful. God is freakishly funny and beautiful in his creativity. They should just let kids watch this in school and we would all grow up to be strong willed environmentalists.

Well friends, I am off to continue watching planet earth. Rent it, watch it, Recycle and plant trees.

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Favorite Christmas Music!

Favorite Christmas Records

1. Sufjan Stevens : Songs For Christmas
2. Mindy Smith: My Holiday
3. Rosie Thomas: A Very Rosie Christmas
4. Nsync: Home For Christmas
5. Yo-yo-Ma: Songs of Joy and Peace
6. Frank Sinatra: The Christmas Collection
7. Ella Fitzgerald: Ella Wishes You A Swinging Christmas
8: The Hotel Cafe Presents Winter Songs

You cant find these on itunes but check out myspace for...
9. Nashville friends doing christmas songs (

10.The choir at your door (aaron roche and winston jazz routine) these myspaces haven't been updates since myspace only let you have 3 songs... so thats why they are all on 3 different sites.... this might be my favorite christmas record ever so don't let the number of myspaces turn you away.

part 1
part 2
part 3

20 mins to do this.

There have been at least 20 times in the past month that I've meant to get on here. Right when I sit down to right a million things come into my head that I need to be doing. I keep going back and forth in my head, trying to decide if I should close this window and start working on my to-do list.

Its finals season here in Nashville. This next week will decide if I make it to May graduation. Mainly two classes decide that future, accounting two and business finance. If you get the chance and want to pray that coffee kicks in and that I find good study places on and off campus, I wouldn't hate it.

Anyone want to trade?

I'm also heading home next monday so that will be fun to hang out with the fam for a couple of days before coming back to Nashville. I work at an apple retail store in Nashville, I started working in september and have really liked it, the only downside is that I have to work during christmas. However, I did get some time off after finals for a couple days and I'll get to go home and see my family and friends for a little bit. So if you are in Nashville after the 21st let me know cause I would love to hang out with ya.

okay later friends.

Thursday, November 27, 2008


Thanksgiving is probably my favorite holiday. Everyone in my family comes together and hangs out for two days. It usually starts with my dad cooking breakfast for everyone. He has the worlds best eggs benedict. He started cooking today around 10 and didn't quit till around noon. They are so good. Then Mom takes over and begins cooking everything you dream about in a thanksgiving meal. The Aunts and Uncles come over and it seems like everyone rotates doing jobs while watching the football games and playing with the younger cousins.

Coming home for me is always an odd ritual. After 4 years of college I've thankfully become a different person and every time I go home its like a constant battle to not return to the role I played growing up in my family. By that I mean I remember the dynamic between my siblings and myself. The way all of us can get along, how their personalities drive me nuts and at the same time make me laugh. Its so easy for me to change into someone that took me 4 years to break away from. I know a lot of my friends struggle with that. I think in a way its a part of some hope we have to return to what we knew as children. When we still believed in a place that was home. Its not that I don't love my family, I just think in some ways we have all grown up in different directions from each other and every time we get together its like we are learning how to be who are now around each other. Maybe the transition gets easier as we get older, at least I hope so.

I was reading earlier and I thought I would leave you with this Freddy B quotes

"Listen to your life. See it for the fathomless mystery that it is. In the boredom and pain of it no less than in the excitement and gladness: touch, taste, smell your way to the holy and hidden heart of it because in the last analysis all moments are key moments, and life itself is grace"